Do any of y’all do this? November 24, 2006

It’s 4:41AM. I’m up dressed, vaguely made up (OK, OK, it’s what was left on my face when I went to bed last night, freshened with some new blush and powder…), and waiting for my dad to cook me breakfast all so my mother, my aunt, my two young cousins and I can hit the After Thanksgiving Sales.

The ONLY time I do this is when I’m home for Thanksgiving. It’s not a drive I have unless surrounded by the other women in my family. Today, we go in search of outrageously expensive yarn that’s on sale for an extravagant amount, preschool board games, and some panties that don’t hang off my backside. Well, that’s what I’m searching for. I’m not sure about anyone else. Although it seems to me that panties that stay put would be a perk for anyone.

Our turkey day was good. We all gathered together at my aunt and uncle’s house and gave thanks, broke bread, picked a carcass clean and then rounded it all out with green bean casserole and copious quantities of pie. Mmmm…pie.

Living in Minnesota, we’re thousands of miles away from family. Most of the time this is not a burden. It gives a lot of freedom–freedom to make our own plans, to establish our own traditions, to stay in our pajamas all day without fear of one of our mothers just “popping by for a minute” and being shocked to find the entire Familia Beege still looking pretty much the way they did when they rolled out of bed that morning. It also means that we have no free babysitting and that Linnea is largely unfamiliar with large portions of her extended family (these, quite frequently, are downers).

But we’ve been on our own so long we don’t really miss not being near family. It’s just our life together, and we’ve managed to make the best of it. When my MIL or SIL say to me, “I don’t know how you manage to raise Linnea without any help!” I think, “First of all: I’ve got help if I need it and Second of all: I have never known any differently.” Sure, it would be nice if when Linnea gets sick we could drop her off at a grandma’s house and go on our merry way like SIL and BIL do. But we’ve NEVER had that. We’ve always had to make the necessary adjustments and adaptations and work together to make it work. Far from being a bad thing, I think it’s made M and I better parents and better partners.

But yesterday, sitting in a cozy room, surrounded by cousins and aunts and uncles and wee girl kidlets, laughing when my uber-manly cousin used the term “blousing” when he described why it was OK that he wore his undershirt tucked into his sweatpants because he always “bloused” it, sipping a lovely warm spiced cider and knowing that even if I had no earthly idea where Linnea was or what she was doing: someone did, and would deal with whatever might come up that needed dealing with–I realized I do miss family. Mostly just when I’m around them, which is nice–I’m not pining away for it–but it IS a hole in my life.

But not for a few more days. 🙂

If I don’t eat something that had a face I’m going to whack out… November 21, 2006

About two months ago, my parents made an announcement.

They’d gone vegan. Not just vegetarian. VEGAN.

Now, pretty much the ONLY thing they could have said that would have shocked me more would have been to say, “Sweetie? Your dad has decided to marry a second wife, and we’re going to move to a quiet little commune in a remote, small town in Utah.”

But I tried to be supportive–they’re doing this for their cardiac health, and given the fact that men on my dad’s side tend to drop dead without warning between the ages of 60 and 65, and Dad’s creeping up on the “magic” number: I’m all in favor of them doing anything that keeps him around for as long as possible. Even, I suppose, a second younger wife and some real estate in Utah.

Since arriving here on Friday, I’ve had tofu, I’ve had soy, I’ve had whole grains up the wazzoo. I’ve been told, “It tastes just like meat! You can’t even tell!” and I’ve been lied to. You can SO tell. It may not taste bad, in and of itself, but it doesn’t taste like meat, so stop trying to convince me that it does. It’s not a lifestyle/dietary choice that I object to in any way…but I’m a pregnant woman, and given my near lustful fantasies of a nice, thick, juicy slab of sirloin: the child I bear is a carnivore. One night I crept over to my youngest brother, and whispered, “Take me to the store. I’ll buy us some protein.” He was up and in the car in a flash.

We bought protein. We also bought some of what Mom calls “whole grain” cereal (complete with air quotes) because Nea took one look at the whole wheat&bran goodness served to her Saturday morning and promptly went on a hunger strike. We bought mac ‘n cheese, we bought Fritos, and we bought dark, yummy chocolate. We bought vegetable beef soup. We bought sausages. And then we pigged out.

We’ve also scoured the freezer. There’s no sign of tofurkey. Thank God.

In honor of the upcoming Holiday Season November 14, 2006

I’m home alone today, and I’ve spent the last hour cleaning our bathroom. Ugh. So gross. Hair EVERYWHERE, which oogs me out, even though it’s mostly head hair and it’s almost entirely mine. Blegh.

So now I’m the proud owner of a ferociously clean bathroom, but I’m also sort of tuckered out from it (hello! Second trimester? Yeah, this is Beege. I thought I was supposed to get more energy from you. Where the hell is it?) so I thought I’d sit down, have a nice cold glass of water, and blog some more.

And since I’m ooged out from my hairy bathroom experience, I thought I’d share some of my favorite things, just to take my mind of the feeling of wet strands of hair clinging to my fingers. *shiver*

• I’m listening to one of my favorite albums of all time. Sarah Mclachlan’s Fumbling Toward Ecstasy, which has the song Possession that she wrote after getting a letter from a stalker and even though I know that’s what inspired the lyrics, I still find it an incredibly sexy song. It’s one of the few albums by a single artist that I can listen to over and over and over and over…well, you get the idea. Usually I can only do that with compilation albums, either soundtracks or mix CDs that I’ve made. But her lyrics are so rich that I never get tired of them.
• I love make up. Love it, love it, love it. Which means I love, love, love Clinique Bonus Time. I always go and buy a tube of Aromatics Elixer body polish ($26) so that I can get the free goodies that you have to spend $25 in order to get. Last week I got the cutest purple cosmetic bag, with some great gloss, eye shadow that I’m currently experimenting with (it includes an almost peacock blue shadow…I’m playing with it, and it’s a departure for this girl who learned all about makeup during the uber-natural late 80’s/early 90’s), and mascara and all sorts of cool stuff.
• I’m also falling in love with DSW. I’d been in there a few times, and didn’t see much, but THEN I discovered their sale section. Sweet. Fancy. Moses. Good deals. Good shoes. I think I’m hooked. It’s almost worth driving out to the Mall of America just so I can go browse.
• Teavana’s Rose Congo combined with Oriental Plum. So, so, so good. And so, so, so discontinued. Boo. Although, because it’s a black tea, I can’t have any until April at the earliest so it’s a bit silly to be booing them now. It’s a pre-emptive boo though.
• JCPenney’s “Socks to Stay Home In”. Those socks are amazing. If you don’t know them, go find them. They’re in stores now. But you will want more than one pair, so don’t say I didn’t warn you.
• Camille Beckman lip balms. Perferably in a tube, though that’s hard to find, and the gloss in a pot will do in a pinch. They use all natural ingredients, and the stuff stays on your lips…no evaporating! I put it on every night before I go to bed, and when I wake up: it’s still there! This means I can do all sorts of abusive things to my lips with makeup during the day, because they get all rehydrated at night.
• Six Feet Under. Gads, I loved that show. I might have to put a season in while I clean the rest of the house, and let Sarah give her pipes a rest.
• Trash television. I just get so sucked into those shows, their mindless glimpses into the human psyche. It’s amazing to me on shows like “Deal or No Deal” when people actually say that $75,000 is “small money”. It’s more than I’ve ever had. It’s more than I’ve ever made. I’d take in a heartbeat and thank you for it.
• Sims. I love this game. I used to play it a LOT, and then I got a real life, with a real husband and real babies, and I didn’t play it as much. But I still enjoy it, and I’ve started playing it again. There’s something about a place that lets you just quit when the game isn’t going your way.
• I love to play “Civilization” with M. He plays it, I tell him what to do, so he functions as sort of my chief advisor while I rule the world. We used to play it all the time when we were first married (heh, when we weren’t doing other stuff). I was so good at ruling that I had spaceflight in the year 350 and my subjects were constantly clamoring to redecorate my throne room. They way to a woman’s heart is through her throne room, doncha know?
• Canoe Ridge vineyards. They make the best merlot I’ve ever tasted. I don’t think I’d be going too far to say it’s the best thing I’ve ever had in my mouth.
• My favorite Christmas CD of all time is called “Winterfall” by Donna Beck and Lee Spears. I think that’s right. It’s a CD that my mom found at some craft show probably 15 years ago, and I swiped it from her when I left home. Shhhhh. Don’t tell. It’s instrumental, more winter music than strictly Christmas music, and I can listen to it for hours at a time. It’s even made M re-evaluate his previously poor opinion of the Christmas music genre.
• Traveling by train. I love it. As long as I can have a compartment. It’s a little too Greyhoundy when you travel coach on a train. But to have your own compartment, with your own potty and shower, and sit and watch the world go by and let the rhythm of the train lull you to sleep…ah, sweet.
• Brand new textbooks. I can remember my first day of classes in Seminary. M and I went to the bookstore together, and he helped me carry my books back to my room (awwwwww!) and we dumped them out on my bed. I held myself back for half a second, thought, “Oh, screw it!” and tored into the plastic wrapping on my Greek lexicon and thrilled to the cracking of the binding as the book was opened for the first time, inhaled the smell of the ink, and just gloried in the sight of all the information that would soon be mine. Or not, as the case would turn out to be in Greek. But still: the feeling was there.  M later told me that it was that moment, when I dove nose first into my pile of school books, that he thought, “I think I could fall in love with this girl.” I’m sure my fabulous rack didn’t hurt my chances, either.

Practically Orgasmic, I tell ya…

Everyone knows that pregnant women are, well…hormotional for lack of a better word. My hormotionality is manifesting itself in abundant schmoopiness that leads almost immediately to tears.

Which is why watching Extreme Makeover: Home Edition on Sunday night almost sent me over the edge of hormotionality. That show ALWAYS leads to a soggy kleenex (which is why I don’t watch it often) but on Sunday night not only was it the typical sobfest, it was ALSO about a young woman who was a breast cancer survivor. Even when I’m stone cold sober when it comes to hormones, stories about breast cancer get me right where I live. I cried pretty much from 7:01PM CST to 8:05PM CST. And ohhhhhhhhhhh….it was good. 🙂

In other news:

*I made M a hat for winter. I knit it. I’ve knit hats before–baby hats–so I wasn’t particularly challenged by the whole venture. What did suprise me? I knit M a child’s hat, and it fits him. He’s got a teeny tiny head! It made me realize why I look like a freaking bobble head doll whenever we have pictures taken together, AND it made me refresh my prayers anew that this little one would inherit her father’s noggin. Small, and chock full of brains. Although Linnea didn’t. She got my head. Big, and still chock full of brains.

*It’s getting time to compose the Annual Christmas Letter, wherein I update friends and loved ones on all things Beege. We’re sort of holding off until we have the “pink or blue?” ultrasound, so that we have some additional exciting news to include. Assuming Q cooperates, of course, and flashes us like a good little whatever she is. I like the exercise of writing the Christmas letter…it sort of lets me review our year, and see what we thought the highlights were. I also love receiving Christmas letters–as long as they are the highlight kind, and not the, “On June 24th, I went to the grocery store and bought some orange juice. But they were out of my regular kind of orange juice, so I had to buy a different brand. But that brand wasn’t as good as my orange juice, so I didn’t want to drink it. So I went to another store on June 25th and they did have my kind of orange juice, so everything ended up OK.” kind. (Heh, I realized while typing that this little bit of sarcasm could probably describe 75% of my blog entries.)

*I love, love, love Ikea. We have a HUGE window in our living room. Floor to ceiling. So it’s where we put our tree. I wanted something to sort of frame the tree in the window. Last year I hung snowflakes on varying lengths of ribbon. It was OK, but not quite right. This year I found some GREAT star lights at Target (for $20). I found BETTER star lights at Ikea (for $7.99). Oh, and the right kind of orange juice. 😉 Anyhoo: I’ve got Christmas lights up in my window, and I’m so happy! I’m sort of wanting to get the tree up, since we usually do it the weekend after Thanksgiving but this year we’ll be gone. But I don’t think I can get the tree up this early and not go apeshit crazy by the time Christmas gets here. I love Christmas, but there’s a point where it’s just time for it to be done, you know?

*I’m also putting the winter comforter on our bed. I don’t need it, but M does. He steals ALL the covers at night and I wake up cold and shivering, wondering where in the hell my blankets went. I’m hoping if I put the heavier comforter on, he’ll at least let me keep a sheet or something.

*I love that since making the decision to be a SAHM, I have time to read my blogs again. I’ve got a little roster of people I try and read everyday (see column at the left) but when I was working, I was lucky if I could get here and write once a month, much less read like I liked to. I’m also loving that it’s NaNoBloMo (or whatever it is) so that MOST of my bloggers are writing an entry a day. Keeps me entertained. And God only knows: that’s the only reason for these wonderful ones to blog, right? 😉

I’m not terribly political… November 8, 2006

So I’ll just say, ‘Thank ya, Jesus!’ for the results of yesterday’s election, and leave it at that.

And so it begins… November 1, 2006

Nea is a very curious little girl–just like all kids her age. She’s wild about finding out how things work, and she’s always been very free about asking questions.

 The other day, she asked a question. I answered it. She asked, “Why?” I answered. She asked, “Why?” I answered. She asked, “Why?”

I shook it off as a fluke. I’d been hoping that perhaps, just perhaps, we’d move right on past this stage of her development and into well-thought out and stimulating discourse on a myriad of topics ranging from art and literature to current events.

Except this morning, while I was checking in on a couple of bulletin boards I post on, she asked what I was doing.

B: I’m checking my messages.
L: Why?
B: Because sometimes people like to talk to your mama.
L: Why?
B: Because they think I’m a nice lady.
L: Why?
B: Because I’m gorgeous, intelligent, direct, and have a great sense of humor!
L: Why? Oh, wait. Mama? Do you smell poop?

Thank God. I was saved from the interrogative rack by a poopy diaper.  I was able to deflect further questions along this line by watching Laurie Berkner’s “Chicken Song” video for an hour and a half. It’s a three minute song. I listened to it over and over and over for an hour and a half. Methinks perhaps the “whys” weren’t so bad.