Mairsy Dotes

"No faith is as solid as a wounded faith."

It’s from England, it must be classy! March 31, 2005

Filed under: Uncategorized — beege @ 7:23 pm

I stole this from Zoe, who stole this from Kara, who stole it from someone else. There are no original questions, only slightly original answers. 😉

LAYER ONE: Just the Facts
Real name: Kristen
Birth date: 02/27/75–Same as Chelsey Clinton and Liz Taylor
Birthplace: Spokvegas
Current Location: Middle of Nowhere, Kans-ass
Eye Color: Blueish-green with a thread of brown around the pupil.
Hair Color: Blonde, more or less.
Righty or Lefty: Lefty
Zodiac Sign: Pisces.

LAYER TWO: On The Inside
Your heritage: Mostly Finnish and German, but I’ve got a good dash of Bohemian in there to keep me spicy!
Shoes you wore today: When I HAD to wear shoes: suede clogs. Otherwise: bare foot.
Your weakness: Smoked salmon and Tillamook extra sharp cheddar cheese
Your fears: Losing Linnea.
Your perfect pizza: Medium thick crust, with black olives and mushrooms. Yum!

LAYER THREE: Yesterday, Today, Tomorrow
Your most overused phrase: Dude, fuck, or sweet!
Your thoughts first waking up: Um, if Linnea woke me up: Good God, child! Can’t you pleeeeeeze sleep though the night?! If Linnea didn’t wake me up: Good God! I hope nothing happened to Linnea!
Your best physical feature: I have spectacular skin, and I’ve got huge eyes. I’ve also been told I have dangerous lips…I decided to take that as a compliment.
Your bedtime: Usually between 10:30 and 11…depends on what’s happening on Leno.
Your most missed memory: Um, if I miss it, how do I know?

Iced Tea or Soft Drink: Iced Tea
Soup or Salad: Salad
Single or group dates: Depends. Sometimes it’s fun to go out in a group, sometimes it’s better to be alone.
Slip-ons or Lace-ups: Slip ons. But better yet is no shoes at all.
Fruity or Herbal: Herbal.
Jell-O or Pudding: Mm, neither, actually.
Coffee or Hot Chocolate: Coffee

Smoke: No. Other than a couple of times when I smoked a bunch of cigarillos with a girlfriend and we got totally buzzed and drank too much wine and when we woke up the next morning we both tasted like bar rag. And, I’ve taken puffs of M’s Cubans.
Cuss: Fuck, yeah!
Sing: I sing a lot to Linnea. She’s the only one I can sing in front of without just wanting to die of embarassment–even though I’ve been told I’ve a lovely voice.
Take a shower everyday: Pretty much.
Still talk to your first love: No. He is dead to me.
Like your job: Not especially. I hope to like it more in a different environment.
Like(d) high school: I did. It was a lot of fun. I wouldn’t want to do it again or anything, but for a one-time thing: it was good.
Get motion sickness: Not usually.
Think you’re attractive: Depends. Sometimes I think I’m freaking hot, other times I think M ought to trade me in for a newer model.
Think you’re obsessive-compulsive about anything: Yes. No. Yes. No. Mostly No.
Get along with your parents: Absolutely. I adore them.
Like thunderstorms: Yes, yes, yes!!!! Spring severe weather season is coming, and while I’m NOT looking forward to all the tornado hooplah, I am SO looking forward to some good thunderstorms.
Play an instrument: Snort. I have a friend who would answer “skin flute”. But I played violin.

LAYER SIX: In the past month have you…
Spent more than $100 on a single item that wasn’t an obigatory item? No. Not on a single item.
Had a verbal argument where you screamed at someone: No, not in the past month.
Purchased Cottage Cheese: Ew, NO.
Surprised someone for a special event: No. I wish I could say, “Hell yeah!” But I can’t.
Purchased a new CD: Yes. Willie Nelson’s “Songs”.
Gone to the mall: Yep. In fact, if I stopped indulging in retail therapy, I could probably afford actual therapy.
Purchased an MP3: Dude. I just figured out how to blog. Needless to say: MP3’s are a bit beyond my technological savvy.
Sent your resume out for a new job: Not a resume, but I’ve submitted paperwork.
Been on stage: Does a pulpit count as a stage?
Moved: No.
Had lunch with a group of ten or more: Yes. It was a funeral lunch.
Had a cold: Yes.
Changed your hairstyle: Well, it’s finally long enough for me to do “long styles” with it. Does that count?
Taken a vacation: God, no. I wish. I really really really wish.

Played a game that required removal of clothing: You mean other than foreplay?
Been trashed or extremely intoxicated: Snort. Um, yeah.
Been caught in a lie: I don’t recall. I’m sure I have been, but I don’t remember a specific time.
Been called a tease: Yes. By the aforementioned first love who is dead to me now.
Caused a car wreck: Yes.
Shoplifted: No.

LAYER EIGHT: Getting Older
Age where you believe your life really began (if not yet, give a guess): I think I realized all the potential that life had to offer when I met M when I was 23. Life absolutely got better from the moment I laid eyes on him, and even the shit parts since have been better than the good stuff that happened before.
Do you have children, if so, how many and what are their ages: Yes, Linnea. She’s 14 months and a day.
What do you really want to be when you grow up: That’s a million dollar question. Maybe a writer. Maybe a professor.
Where would you like to retire to: Oregon Coast or Texas Hill Country.
One fear about getting older: Losing myself–my memories, my sense of self.

LAYER NINE: The Opposite Sex
Eye color: Don’t care.
Hair color: Funny fact. All the blonds I dated ended up being enormous azzholes. All the brunettes (can a guy be a brunette?) treated me far better than I deserve. Obviously, what hair M has left is brown.
Short or long hair: Doesn’t really matter. M has no hair, and I like him fine.
Height: Doesn’t matter.
Best first date location: Gads. Our first date was at a zoo. We held hands and watched the orangutans have oral sex. That was pretty good.

LAYER TEN: In The Numbers…
Number of jobs I’ve had in my life: Eight. My very first job was to dress up as Frosty the Snowman and give candy out to children at a drugstore. That freaking SUCKED.
Number of people I could trust with my life: 3
Number of CDs that I own: No clue. Way more than I actually listen to.
Number of piercings: 3, though I wish now it was only two.
Number of tattoos: None, although I have a deep, secret yearning to get one. If I ever stumble on the perfect design, I’ll probably get one.
Number of times my name has appeared in the Newspaper? No clue. More than I can count.
Number of scars: 2 on my knees.
Number of things in my past that I regret: I regret treating Dennis Eller monstrously in the ninth grade–he was so good to me, and I ended up being a total bitch to him. I regret not speaking out more. I regret letting people bully me into doing things because I am strong.


I can SEE! I can SEE!

Filed under: Uncategorized — beege @ 5:07 pm

So it’s been a shamefully long time since I’ve been to an optometrist–I’m thinking like maybe six years? And I’ve got terrible vision, so it’s not like I don’t NEED to have my optometrist on speed dial or anything. But with all the fun of not having insurance, etc. it got pushed on the back burner.

But I’ve been having trouble seeing lately…some headaches…night vision has been lousy (not good for someone who drives at night all the freaking time)…plus my final pair of disposable contacts wasn’t fitting right and driving me crazy. So I took the time to find an eye doctor that was on our insurance plan and made an appointment for this morning.

Two hours and $500 later, I came out of there with brand spanking new contacts (whoo-hoo!) and having ordered a kick-ass pair of glasses (I think they’re Vera Wang frames…la-di-da!). That was a huge chunk of moolah to lay down, but I got like six pairs of contacts, a year’s worth of solution, free office visits, and my designer glasses for all that, so I figure: *gulp* Not too shabby. Especially if it means I can get rid of my old, round, coke bottle glasses that I have been wearing for almost 10 years.

It’s just amazing. You don’t realize how much you can’t see, until suddenly you can see again. If there were leaves on the trees, I’d be able to see individual leaves. The doc got me to 20/15 correction…not bad, considering that I’m legally blind without correction.

PLUS: M paid me $100 to put away all my clean clothes, and all Linnea’s clean clothes. I LOATHE putting clothes away. I don’t know why. I always have, though. I think it’s the biggest “problem” M faces in living with me. He can’t freaking put a new trash bag in the trash can (he just stacks the garbage that won’t fit in the can on the counter beside the can) and I don’t put away my clean laundry. So I took him up on his offer. He thinks he got the better end of the deal. Sucka. What he taught me is that if I let the clean clothes sit in hampers long enough: I make money. Double Sucka! 😉


Questions for Jess, and Cyn, and Sal March 27, 2005

Filed under: Uncategorized — beege @ 2:46 pm

I feel like that dude from “Inside the Actor’s Studio”. You know–James Lipton who always asks those five questions from the “amazing, splendiferous Bernard Piveau”? I totally watch that show. But Will Ferrell’s skit on SNL about it actually makes me snort so hard it hurts, it’s so funny.

Please note that while I was sorely tempted, not one of the following questions is “What is your favorite curse word?”

Questions for Jess
1. As a writer, I know that you savor the flavor of words. What is your favorite word?
2. What book could you not live without (and if the answer is “the Bible” pick another one, OK? ‘Cuz that’s sort of a given.)?
3. So, um, when do you celebrate Easter?
4. What gives you peace? You know that deep down peace that just gives you that serene glow, and absolutely no shit can touch you for just a little while. That kind of peace.
5. What is your favorite article of clothing and why?
Questions for Cyn
1. What is the most difficult thing you’ve ever had to do, but were glad you did?
2. If you could own any piece of clothing, price no object, what would it be? If someone wanted to buy it from you at the shop, would you sell it?
3. Fast forward 16 years. Connor wants a tattoo. Yes or no? Would it make a difference if it was a shamrock with “Happy St. Paddy’s Day!” written in it?
4. What is your favorite candle scent? Why?
5. If you could live anywhere in the world, where would it be?
Questions for Sal
1. You are offered the acting role of a lifetime, one that will guarantee you fame and recognition of your peers. It requires you be away from home for three weeks. Do you take it?
2. What is a role that you dream of bringing to life, but just haven’t had the opportunity to do so yet?
3. What sort of girl do you dream of Oz marrying some day?
4. What is your proudest moment?
5. Mac ‘n Cheese: Kraft or ho-made?

Especially for Poppy…

Filed under: Uncategorized — beege @ 2:38 pm

Wanna know Linnea’s new trick? Do ya? You know you do.

She does the “Tch-cha!” sound like Dale Gribble. I kid you not. M taught her how to do it.

I think I’ve got the coolest kid in the freaking world.


Now, if you owned one of those “new” VW Bugs…

Filed under: Uncategorized — beege @ 2:29 pm

…wouldn’t you always make sure that there was a flower in the little dashboard vase?

Now, I know that there are many people out there that think the vase in the dashboard is just a ridiculous waste of plastic. Me? I love it. It’s one of those features that make me itch to own a VW Bug when my days of hauling children and strollers and diaperbags and animals and home offices around with me are over and donewith. Sadly, I think I’ll hit “Minivanhood” before I hit “VW Bughood”, but such are the stages of life (I even have a name for my Bug when/if it happens: the Bugabago, like Dale Gribble’s van on “King of the Hill”.).

The reason I bring this up, is today after my nursing home service (Service #6 in 4 days) there was a granny apple green VW Bug parked next to me with an empty vase. Now, I can understand thinking the vase is dumb and not getting it. But getting it and letting it go empty?!?! That’s a crime. Is there anything sadder than an empty vase, just waiting for flowers? Given the fact that my husband gives me flowers only when there’s the distinct possibility of hell freezing over, I can say with good authority: no. There’s not.

I have a friend (Hi, P!) who owns a Bug. She always makes sure there is something in her vase. She used to change it according to the season, and one season was represented by a lovely pink gerbera daisy. The last time I saw her, she had this fabulous sort of sparkly explosion on a stick in her vase. But the vase is never empty. I think this is why she and I are such good friends. We understand the loneliness of vases waiting to be filled.


La! La-la-la-laaaaaaa! La-la-la-laaaaaaaa…. March 25, 2005

Filed under: Uncategorized — beege @ 7:48 am

preacherbeege will be on temporary hiatus for the Holy Week/Easter holiday weekend. Regular programming will resume next week.

PS: Imagine the subject line as that annoying 60’s “please stand by music”. Otherwise this post is just dumb. 😉 Snort. Yeah. The subject like TOTALLY saves it.


Questions for MaryBeth March 23, 2005

Filed under: Uncategorized — beege @ 8:56 am

Girl, I didn’t forget you–just haven’t had time to sit and think up questions!

1.) What is it about your best friend that makes them your best friend?

2.) What is your greatest fear that you’ve overcome? What is the next one you want to take on?

3.) What is your favorite cheese and why?

4.) If you could live anywhere in the world, where would you go?

5.) When you get angry, how do you release that anger?